What I Really Want

My computer wallpaper at work is a picture of some lovely lake in the mountains that someone took while doing trail work. I looked at it yesterday and realized that I really want to spend the weekend there.

If it was summer, I could grab my backpack and drive to the mountains this evening and hide out by a lake for two days. I really want to hide out by a lake. I realize that I could still do it, but it would be cold and that doesn't sound as nice. In exactly four months I will have a two week vacation somewhere warm. I can't wait.

Something to be Thankful for

I got engaged a month ago. It is really strange to write about it so long after the fact, but I have been sooo busy that I haven't had time to say much about it.

I am going to marry Ismael Alarcon on March 30. It feels strange for me to write that; I am still getting used to the idea of being married (I guess that is what engagement is for). I can't wait to have him around more often, though.

Izzy and I have been going to a marriage class for the last month as part of our pre-marital counseling. The first week, we were asked to tell our story. I haven't ever told anyone our story before. Most people watched it happen and knew more of it while it was going on than we did, so I have never really had to. Please forgive me because I plan to write most of it now.

We met a year ago in August when I started attending Restoration Life. Izzy was the fourth person I remember meeting at Restlife. I am really happy I can remember the first time we met. I liked him. He was very friendly and open.

For the first month I knew Izzy, I saw him off and on when he was at church. I remember always enjoing conversation with him, and I remember going salsa dancing with him and our friend Cathy. Izzy has rhythm issues. Near the end of September or the beginning of October, we ended up spending a lot of time together because his roommate was interested in my friend, and Izzy and I ended up being ditched together often so they could spend time together.

I started attending the small group he and my friends were in. One week I called him to ask if he minded if I brought my guitar and played a few songs before he led discussion, and the next thing I knew, he had invited himself to play with me. He wanted to practice beforehand, so we started getting together after prayer group on Sunday nights to play.

I am so thankful for our unecessarily long practice sessions. We always had dinner, and then we would talk for a few hours, play guitar for about 45 minutes, and then talk some more. I remember thinking that we had some strangely intimate conversations for two people who weren't interested in dating each other, but I enjoyed spending time with him and I grew to value his friendship. This was back when I was having a hard time finding a job and was really discouraged. Izzy was a huge encouragement to me, and my reminder that God does hear. (That is what his name means).

I can't point out when I started to "like" Izzy. I remember fighting it for a good month between mid-October and mid-November. I really didn't want to want to be with him for a number of reasons, and I was afraid. At the same time, his friendship meant so much to me, and I really enjoyed his company. By this time last year, I took off for England and was completely unable to get him off my mind.

At some point, I had learned that Izzy had made a committment to not date anyone until the end of the year after a long and difficult break up. By last Thanksgiving, I was sure he was interested in me, but I knew he wouldn't say anything until January at least. I that six weeks seemed like forever to me. We spent a good amount of time together, but he never said anything, and sometimes, I didn't know how I was going to hold out.

By Christmas Eve, it had become almost ridiculous and I decided that I couldn't be around him anymore if we weren't going to be honest about how we felt. He apparently felt the same way, because he came over that afternoon and told me how he felt about me. The rest of the day was a blur.

After Christmas we began dating. It was actually more like extreme dating (for me) because we would go almost three weeks at a time without a day apart. That was a difficult adjustment for me. I really don't know how to capture the past ten months. We have had a lot of fun and learned a lot, and have mostly been very happy. Izzy is my best friend, even when he drives me crazy.

Anyway, after telling me that he planned to spend the day with his dad in Winters, I made plans with Katie to spend October 13 (the day after her birthday) with her and her boyfriend at Apple Hill. We headed out to the Jack Russell Brewing Company because she had some business with them related to her work. We were drinking beer and enjoying the day when my friends, who both work in agriculture, suggested we check out the property. We were meandering around some cultivated blackberries in an odd manner when I looked up and saw Izzy standing in the middle of the bushes.

I was happy to see him, and at first, I thought he had decided to catch up with us. Then I realized that the whole thing was planned and my friends has silently walked away. Then a trembling and misty-eyed Ismael pulled the ring I knew he had out of his pocket, got on his knees and asked me to marry him about three times. My lying friends took a few pictures and then we all celebrated with more beer and went to go see my parents.

That was the proposal. It was beautiful and low-key, and perfect. Izzy included all of my close friends and family in one way or another. I am really so thankful for him, and I can't wait to marry him.